Parents of special needs kids and the people whose job it is to educate those kids must stay in regular communication.  No question.

            That point of regular contact is often between the parent and the paraeducator:

• The para often meets the bus or is waiting when the child is dropped off or picked up.
• The para is often more accessible than the teacher(s) or the case manager.
• The parent may think it is the para (who works most closely with the child) who most needs to know that Susie is agitated this morning or Joe didn’t get his Rice Krispies.

            True as all these things may be they cannot be allowed to substitute for direct parent and teacher contact, especially when the teacher is also the child’s case manager, responsible for implementing the Individualized Education Plan (IEP).

            The paraeducator should not (even when he or she is willing) be placed in the position of buffer between the parent and teacher. 

            The teacher needs to know the parents’ concerns first hand, not filtered through the para.  The parents need to feel confident that their concerns are actually acknowledged by the teacher.

            With the approval of the case managers, I have in the past sent home daily with my kid (one-on-one) a “Communication Log” (using a composition notebook) that regularly addressed only homework, projects, upcoming tests, etc. 

            Whenever I included a note about behavior, problems, or other matters unrelated to assignments or tests, I always showed it first to the teacher.  Whenever the parent put a reply or a message in the log, I shared that with the teacher as well.

            Occasionally, teachers would use this log to directly communicate with the parents because they knew (1) that it was actually read on a regular basis and (2) that notes in a backpack can and do get frequently lost or overlooked.

            I have alternatively, on a several times a week basis (and again with the approval of the case manager), sent by email to the parents a brief “point sheet” report about how well a child was meeting his personal goals that week (turning in homework, completing classwork, and the like).  Copies of these emails were routinely sent to the case manager.

            Make sure the teacher(s) and case manager know whatever communication you are having with the parents and, in a friendly yet professional way, suggest to the parents when appropriate that “maybe this is something you need to share directly with the teacher.”

            “I’ll tell the teacher” should be a rare, not a regular thing said by the paraeducator to the parent.